Dave's Birthday

On Wednesday night Dave and I drove up to Salt Lake to go to karaoke night at the Trap, one of the gay clubs in Salt Lake. I love going there on Sunday nights because they play Latin music, but tonight we were just going to sing songs and get drunk. And we did, thanks to drinks beforehand at CJ's and vodka Jello made by Dave's friend Saia. Dave and I sang "I'll Cover You" and "The Boy is Mine" and were backup singers for a lot of the other people doing karaoke. We had lots of fun and brought Dave's birthday in with a bash. We slept over at CJ's house, and when I got home I got lectured by my dad for not telling them that I was not coming home.

On Thursday night for Dave's birthday he wanted me to take him grocery shopping at Walmart since he doesn't have a car. Then we went to the gym for three hours, working out for two hours and sitting in the hot tub/pool for an hour.

We also went out Friday night to the Sound. It opened since I moved away, but I've been there once for New Year's Eve last year. It was a fun night. There was a drag show and the music is really fun there, a nice change from Axis' music. It was fun to dance and get crazy with Dave again. He smuggled in a bottle of Smirnoff in his sock and we bought some Sobe at the club so we could mix it in the bathroom. We are so cheap, I love it. I'm so glad Dave and I are still best friends even though I live so far away and that I got to be here for the start and end of his birthday.

Home for the Holidays

I arrived in Salt Lake at around 10:00 PM last Saturday. I could definitely tell I was flying to Salt Lake because half of the plane was filled with hot young guys. The disturbing part was that it seemed like they all had their Books of Mormon with them. The guy next to me read his the whole way from Phoenix to Salt Lake.

My sister picked me up from the airport. She brought her boyfriend with her so I got to meet him. They're planning on getting married next May. They just met last July. Mormons typically move really fast. He seems nice. She seems happy though so that's good. Pretty soon I'll be the only non-married one of all my siblings. Looks like I'll be taking another trip back here in May. I got home and said hi to my parents before going to bed.

My dad made waffles on Sunday morning and asked me to go to church with them. I told him I would go next week on Christmas, but I wasn't going today. While they were at church I went to the store and visited my best friend Dave. It was good to see him again. I was glad I didn't have to go to church when I didn't want to like I had done for so long.

Things are going well with my whole family. It seems pretty normal, like before I came out to them. I'm glad they've had time to get used to the idea. My nieces and nephews are totally cute. I went shopping with my sister-in-law which was a lot of fun. I got to talk about my life in Ohio, which my other family members don't really ask me about. I think they kind of block out the fact that I'm gay, which is how they deal. But Sage told me some family secrets that were pretty surprising. Just goes to show we're not the perfect Mormon family like everyone tries to portray. Although things seem back to normal with my family I don't really like hanging out with them for too long. I'll be excited to go back to Ohio. It makes me not very excited for Christmas this year.

Last night I went with my parents and my sister and her boyfriend to Salt Lake to eat at Crown Burger and see the Christmas lights at Temple Square. Dinner was fun but I didn't like walking around the temple because it reminded me of all the things I don't like about the church. For example, I won't get to see my sister get married because it will be in the temple, and only Mormons who follow all the rules of the church are allowed to go in. Everyone was coupled up and I couldn't help but think how I wouldn't be able to hold hands with a boy there. Utah can be fun but I haven't been able to go out yet. Hopefully tonight Dave and I will go out with some of his friends up in Salt Lake.

Update on the Provo High GSA

The Provo High School Gay-Straight Alliance that I talked about here
and here is in the newspaper again. This time a state senator wants to introduce a bill in the next Legislative session to ban the club. One of his arguments is this:

In my mind, if you are in the chess club, what do you talk about? Chess. If you are in the dance club, what do you talk about? Dance. If you are in a gay club, what do you talk about? I just don't believe members of sexual orientation clubs should be sanctioned by the public schools — what they are talking about even a part of the public schools. They should not be allowed to have that on school property at all. It's just wrong.

You can read the rest of the article for all the arguments for and against this proposed bill. I don't think it will stand up in court and that the club will still be able to meet. Just goes to show you how messed up some people's(i.e. Mormons) view of sexual orientation is.

On Saturday I'm heading home to Utah for Christmas. I'll be there for ten days. I hope I survive. And although I love my family, I can't wait until I'm back in Ohio.

[Update]
The governor of Utah gives his opinion on the proposed bill.

Survivor: Guatemala finale

Last night was the Survivor finale. The final three were Danni, Rafe and Stephenie. Rafe and Steph should have taken Lydia with them to the final three so that either of them would have won the last immunity challenge, then taken the other to the final two. Rafe went behind Steph's back and made a promise to Danni that he would take her to the final three, so Lydia was voted out. At the challenge Rafe was the first out and it came down to Steph and Danni and the way the challenge was set up Danni won because she was so tall, she had no problem leaning against the pole. It was heartbreaking to see Steph give it her all but finally fall down. Rafe was a good sport and told Danni she didn't have to take him to the final two even though she promised him she would. I was so close to having my dream finale of Rafe and Steph. Danni decided to take Steph with her to the final two because she thought she had a better chance of winning against Steph because Steph had backstabbed so many people. I had mixed feelings about Steph being in the final two over Rafe but I have loved Steph ever since Palau, so to see her make it to the final two was awesome. I just wish she could have gone with the gay Mormon that played an amazing game. But it is Rafe's fault that Danni won the last immunity challenge and he was the first one out of the challenge, so I think Steph deserved to be in the final two. Unfortunately, the jury voted Danni the winner. What a disappointing end to my favorite season of Survivor. Steph deserved to win. Maybe she'll be back for another season.

SSA should not mean Same-Sex Attraction

I take a pause from posting about my personal life to bring you this article from my home state's newspaper.

Gives you some insight into the way the Mormon church works. I'm so glad this didn't happen to me as much, but my heart goes out to others out there who are struggling as Matis did. I hate how the Mormon Church labels being gay as SSA to make it sound like a disease that can be cured. Also check out the part that says,

After a sacred experience Fred says he had in the temple in the hours following their conversation with Stuart, he and his wife prayed together there and "turned Stuart over to Heavenly Father." The details are too personal to recount, but a certain peace came to them, they said.

Basically this poor man's parents let him commit suicide after receiving inspiration in the temple that it was ok to let him go. How scary is that! I personally don't think God was behind that.

I bet I know what a favorite gift among my family will be this year for Christmas.

SSA really stands for sulfosalicylic acid and is used to test for protein in the urine. (I'm studying for my Renal exam.)

Outwit, Outplay, Outlast

Survivor fans will recognize the title of this post from that reality show. I am a huge Survivor fan. This season the players are in the Guatemalan jungle. There're two characters in particular that I like-Rafe, a gay Mormon and Steph, who I fell in love with when she was on Survivor:Palau(they brought her back this season). I will be happy if either wins. For those who don't remember the premise of Survivor, 16 people are put in a remote location, they learn how to cope with little food and water, going through a series of competitions and voting off one person each show until the last two people remain. At that point it's up to the jury composed of the last seven players voted off to choose the Survivor who is most deserving to win a million dollars. We are now down to five players, Judd being voted off at the last tribal council.

Lately I can't help but feel like I'm playing my own version of Survivor. The winner earns the chance to be with Kip, a prize I'd much rather have than a million dollars. There are only two players in this version of Survivor. We both have different factors working in our favor. I happen to live in the same state as Kip, for example. The other player got the advantage this week, but it's far from over.

It's getting down to the nitty gritty and I'm trying to keep myself from getting paranoid like so many Survivor players do. I have no idea how this will ultimately end and it's tearing me apart. I wish the other player would realize that he needs to step away from the game. Everyone has their first love that they feel like they want to be with forever, but he needs to move on and let Kip be happy. In the meantime I'm giving Kip the space he wants, hoping the time we shared was enough to help him see I'm the one he should choose.

Many of you probably think I shouldn't wait around for Kip while he decides who he wants to be with. But this week apart has shown me even more that I don't want to be without Kip, I like him too much. He makes me so happy when we're together. I know he's going through a rough time right now and I need to give him the time he needs to work through it all.

I prefer watching Survivor on TV where my own feelings aren't involved. The winner of Survivor:Guatemala will be decided mid-December. I think I'm gonna have to wait longer than that to see who wins Survivor:Ohio.