Off to DC for Spring Break

Well on a sort of last minute decision, Kip and I have decided to head to our nation's capital for Spring Break with four of our friends from school. We'll see if I finally make it up the Washington Monument. Today is also the six month anniversary of our first date, so I'm excited that I get to spend it in the car with him and then in DC together. This is our first trip together so that's exciting. I'll let you know how it goes.

Botellones in Spain

Spain has been on my mind lately since it was exactly a year ago that I was there last for Spring Break. I was pleasantly surprised when Yahoo! News posted this article on Friday about 25,000 people at a botellon in Granada to protest a new law aimed at stopping these drinking binges. I knew the date was around when I had my first botellon in Granada, but it wasn't until I looked at my journal that I saw that it was the exact same date, just one year later, so I thought that was an odd coincidence. The one I went to probably had less than 200 people at it, but it was a lot of fun to be hanging out in a mall parking lot drinking Tinto de Verano with a whole bunch of Spaniards. I was hoping to do one again the next time I go, so I hope this law doesn't put an end to them.

The likes of him ain't welcome in these here parts

My little sister is getting married in May. She's my last sibling to get married. We were always close growing up and were often referred to as "The Twins." The only negative thing about our relationship was that I couldn't tell her what was going on in my personal life since I wasn't out to her. I hoped that our relationship would be made stronger when I came out to her last year. But as you can read here, she didn't take it well at all and our relationship has deteriorated to the point that I've only spoken to her once since Christmas.

When I found out she had chosen the date of her wedding I called her to ask if I could bring Kip. She didn't really think about it before saying yes. She just wanted to make sure that I really cared about him and that I wasn't bringing him to try to make my parents upset. I told of course I cared about him. I asked Kip if he would come with me and he agreed. I was so excited that Kip was going to meet my family and Dave and see where I grew up.

Fast forward a couple of weeks to last Friday. I was calling my dad back after he left me a message to call him. My mom answered and we chatted for a minute before she blurts out, "We don't want Kip to come to the wedding." I should have seen it coming, but I wasn't even sure they knew I wanted to bring him yet, so I was caught by surprise. Over the next twenty minutes she proceeded to explain why:because they weren't ready for it yet, because Katie changed her mind and I can't take attention away from her on her special day, because my mom doesn't want Kip to come and she not be able to be nice to him. She says she's trying to understand the decisions I made but hasn't been able to deal yet. Keep in mind I came out to them eight months ago. I think a normal family would have been able to deal by now. I don't see how she's ever going to be ok with it because she believes I won't be happy in the long run and that I'm ruining my life. I'm reminded of why I hate the fact that my family is Mormon.

So Kip's not coming with me to the wedding anymore and I have to face my extended family all alone. I'm sure he's relieved and I guess I am too a little just because I don't think my family could have treated him the way he deserves to be treated just because they don't approve of our relationship. I thought about not going at all but I know I'd regret it. It just won't be very special if I don't get to be there with Kip. After the wedding I don't know if I'll ever want to go back.

Who I'm rooting for at the Oscars

I'm attending an Oscar party at Chris' and I have to say I'm excited for this year's show because of all the gay movies up for awards and the opportunity to see Dolly Parton perform "Travelin' Thru," her nominated song from Transamerica. It will be fun to watch the show with a lot of my friends and Kip.

Here's who I want to win for some of the awards tonight:

Best Picture-Of the nominated films, I've seen Brokeback Mountain and Crash. I thought Crash was an amazing film. But I think and, of course, hope that Brokeback Mountain will win for getting the nation to talk about homosexuality.

Best Actor-I hope Heath Ledger wins just because he portrayed a gay cowboy, but I didn't think he did an amazing job, and his accent really annoyed me. I saw Walk the Line and I thought Joaquin did a great job of portraying the "Man in Black."

Best Actress-This will be a tough race between Reese and Felicity. I loved Reese's bubbly personality, vocals and the way she helped Johnny Cash through rough times. But I hope the Oscar will go to Felicity Huffman for playing a man transitioning into a woman. Transamerica was an amazing movie that impacted me even more than Brokeback Mountain did and Felicity deserves to be awarded for the way she made me appreciate the difficulties of being transgendered.

Best Supporting Actor-I liked Jake's character much better than I did Heath's, so if only one of them gets the Oscar I hope it's Jake.

Best Supporting Actress-I love my Jen Lindley from Dawson's Creek and I'm so happy she has a hot man and had an amazing role in this movie. I hope she wins. Of the others nominated, I also saw Rachel in The Constant Gardener. It was a good movie and she was certainly beautiful, but I don't think she should beat out Michelle.

Animated Feature-I'm not that big a fan of animated movies, but I saw Corpse Bride and enjoyed it.

Original Score-Brokeback Mountain

Original Song-"Travelin' Thru"

We'll see what happens tonight!

Another update on Utah bill to ban Gay-Straight Alliances

The Utah legislative session ended at midnight last night. According to the Deseret News, "lawmakers, by not voting, killed a bill that would have allowed school districts to ban student clubs that deal in some way with sexuality — the goal to get rid of the current gay-straight-alliance clubs."

So it looks like this bill will have to wait until next year unless it is brought up again in a special legislative session that may be convened at a later date.

Leaving the church

Thanks to all the people who leave comments on my blog. Elbow left this comment on my blog: "I think that leaving the Church is just as huge as coming out to your parents." It made me think about my reasons for leaving the Mormon Church and I decided to create a post about it since I've already talked about coming out to my parents.

It's kind of hard for me to explain just how big a deal it is to leave the church. I was raised Mormon until I left home at 23, so it's all I knew growing up. My parents and seven siblings are all still in the church and believe that I will not be able to live with them forever if I don't follow the teachings of the church. It is a huge disappointment to them that I no longer attend church or have a testimony(belief that the Mormon Church is true). When I go home I feel like an outsider with my family members.

At the same time for me it was not a big issue at all. I never developed a testimony like so many other gay Mormons out there, so I didn't have to ever reconcile my testimony with my feelings for guys. Not that I didn't go through a period of self-doubt and wishing I could be straight and normal, but that didn't take too long to resolve. It just didn't make sense to me that the church could teach that acting on gay feelings could be wrong since I didn't choose to be gay.

Eventually I came up with the plan that as soon as I came home from my mission and moved away from home that I would stop going to church. When I moved to Ohio in 2004 I went to church here for about two months and then I found gay friends to hang out with so I stopped going to church because I didn't need the instant friends that I gained by going to church. I also had to stop caring about what my Mormon classmates thought about me, which wasn't that hard since I had just met them a couple of months prior. As soon as I was ready to not care about what my family thought of me, I came out to them and told them what I thought of the church. I knew I had to do it because making them happy was not worth lying to them anymore. I am really happy with my decision to come out to them. I am so happy now that I don't have to waste my time going to church. I still believe in God and will always try to be a good person, but I don't need to go to church to do that.

Go Huntsman!

According to The Deseret News Governor Huntsman plans to veto a couple of bills sponsored by Sen. Buttars including the one that I wrote about in my last post that would ban gay clubs in high schools.

Regarding these bills Governor Huntsman said, "If they look and feel like they did in earlier incarnations, I will veto them. We'll have to see what they look like when they reach my desk."

Update on Utah bill to ban Gay-Straight Alliances

The Utah legislature is in session now and I just read an article in The Deseret News that talked about a bill sponsored by Sen. Chris Buttars which he hopes will put an end to Gay-Straight Alliances in Utah high schools. He's not even a representative of Utah County where the Provo High School Gay-Straight Alliance was formed, so I don't know why he felt it was his obligation to get this law passed, besides being a self-righteous bigot.

Here's part of the article:

A bill to tighten controls on clubs at Utah high schools passed out of the Senate Education Committee on Monday, prompting tears from students who fear the bill would effectively shut down Gay-Straight Alliances in public schools.
SB97, sponsored by Sen. Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan, directs schools to deny clubs if their charter or activities would encourage criminal conduct, promote bigotry or involve human sexuality.
Buttars altered the definition of human sexuality Monday to a toned-down version saying any club "advocating or engaging in sexual activity outside of legally recognized marriage or forbidden by state law." Previously, the bill also disallowed "self-labeling" by students as to sexual orientation and "disclosing attitudes or personal conduct" regarding sexual orientation.
But Buttars made it clear to the committee, which voted 4-2 in favor of advancing the bill to the Senate, that Gay-Straight Alliances were still a primary targets of his legislation. Those groups, he said, are indoctrinating students with a "new morality."
"It's pulling down the traditional pillars of morality," Buttars said. "If you say there is no morality because we can do anything we want to do sexually, that's not something we want to do in America."
Buttars, who had missed weeks of the session due to an undisclosed illness, also had a parent speak about how his niece was "targeted, recruited and indoctrinated" by a Gay-Straight Alliance.

What an awful man! He's trying to ban a support group for gay people in high schools because he feels like it would ruin America. Isn't that a violation of church and state and also discriminating against a group of people? I hope that if this bill does pass that somehow the club will be able to continue at Provo High. We'll wait and see.

Traveling meme

Aaron tagged me to do this meme, so here it is:

Here are four items for each category:

Four Jobs I've Had in My Life:

* Paperboy

* Lifeguard at Scera Pool

* Cashier at SuperTarget

* Phlebotomist at a plasma center



Four Movies I Could Watch Over and Over, and Have:

* Latter Days

* Eating Out

* Mean Girls

* The Princess Bride



Four Places I've Lived:

* Orem, Utah

* Sevilla, Spain

* Granada, Spain

* Columbus, Ohio



Four TV Shows I Love to Watch:

* Grey's Anatomy

* Desperate Housewives

* ER

* Survivor



Four Places I've Been on Vacation:

* Spain

* Yellowstone

* New York City, New York

* London



Four Websites I Visit Daily:

* soapoperafan.com

* OSUMC mail

* Hotmail

* shakiramedia.com



Four Favorite Foods:

* enchiladas

* paella

* hamburgers

* mashed potatoes and gravy



Four Places I Would Like to Visit:

* Africa

* Australia

* France

* Florida



Four People I am Tagging with this Meme:

* Mathiew

* Sanjida

* David

* DC

For those who say the Bible condemns homosexuality

I came across this hypothetical letter:

Dear President Bush,

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I
have learned a great deal from you and understand why you would propose
and support a constitutional amendment banning same sex marriage.

As you said "in the eyes of God marriage is based between a man a
woman." I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can.When
someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply
remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an
abomination... End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements
of God's Laws and how to follow them.

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and
female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend
of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in
Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair
price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her
period of menstrual uncleanness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I
tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

4. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus35:2
clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill
him myself, or should I ask the police or someone else to do it?

5. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an
abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality.
I disagree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

6. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair
around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by
Lev.19:27. How would you chooses that they die?

7. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me
unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

8. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different
crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of
two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to
curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the
trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16.
Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we
do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy
considerable expertise in such matters, so I am confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and
unchanging.

In Jesus name, Consolidated People Who Are Less Than Pure in America

You Know You're From Utah when...

You Know You're From Utah When...

Green jell-o with carrots mixed in doesn't seem strange. You can pronounce Tooele. The U is not just a letter - Neither is the Y. You have actually eaten funeral potatoes. You've gotten both heat and frost burns off your car's door handle in the same month. You are not surprised to hear words like "Darn, Fetch, Flip", "Oh, My Heck" and "Shoot". Your tulips get snowed on three times after they come up and twice more after they bloom. Hunting season is a school holiday. The largest liquor store is the state government. You can go skiing and play golf on the same day. 30% humidity is muggy and almost unbearable. Somewhere in your family tree is a polygamist. You know the difference between a 'Steak House' and a 'Stake House'. The elevation exceeds the population You've broken down on the highway and somebody stops to help you You can see the stars at night You have a bumper sticker that says "Families are Forever." You were an aunt or uncle before you were three. Your family considers a trip to McDonald'd a night out.. You feel guilty when you watch Monday Night Football. You drink Coke from a brown paper bag. You consider a temple recommend a credit reference. You believe that you must be 18 or older to order coffee at a restaurant. There is a similarity between a ward basketball game and the L.A. riots. You think Jack Daniels is a country western singer. You can make Jell-O salad without the recipe. You've heard about BYU football in a testimony meeting. You have two gallons of ice cream in your freezer at all times. Your father-in-law thinks Ronald Reagan was a liberal. A member of your family wrote in Lavell Edwards for president in the last election. Cars in the slow lane are traveling the fastest; cars in the fast lane are traveling the slowest; cars in the middle lanes are always trying to exit. Sandals are the best-selling shoes. You have to ask for the uncensored version of "Titanic." Hotel rooms all have the Book of Mormon. You buy your wardrobe at the local grocery superstore. You learn about the Mormon Church by taking history in elementary school. You live in a state where Democrats always come in third place, unless a zoo animal is running. Then they come in fourth. You're on your own if you are turning left. Schools stay open, even if two feet of snow falls overnight, but close for the opening of hunting season. People wear shorts and T-shirts if the temperature rises above 32 degrees. There is a church on every corner, but they all teach the same thing. The most popular public transportation system is a ski lift. People drive to Idaho to pick up a gallon of milk so they can play the lottery. In-state college football rivalries are bigger than the Super Bowl. Beer drinkers don't shop on Sunday. You don't have to breathe cigarette smoke until you walk outside a building. The cost of living rises while your salary drops. Every driveway has a minivan and a pickup truck. When you buy a new vehicle, cigarette lighters are optional equipment but gun and ski racks are standard. Every time a new family moves into your neighborhood, the local elementary school has to hire a new teacher. Your paycheck has an additional 10 percent deduction. "Temple recommends" is acceptable identification for cashing a check. More movies are filmed in your town than in Hollywood. You've never had a Mormon missionary knock on your door. Your neighbors complain about where they live, yet refuse to return to the state they moved from. You make a toast with red punch at your wedding reception. You have more raw wheat stored than some Third World countries. Your idea of a good time is playing Pictionary in the cultural hall. Your idea of a wild party is a six pack of Pepsi and a PG-13 movie. You and all your friends come to your mother for a haircut in her kitchen. You measure Kool-Aid by parts per million. You think "You're a 10 cow wife" is a compliment. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Utah.

Get Your Own "You Know You're From" Meme Here



More cool things for your blog at
Blogthings

Sarah's Weekend Visit

I wanted to put up a quick post while I take a break from studying for my GI test on Friday.

This past weekend Julie's friend Sarah who we stayed with on our trip to DC came up to Columbus to visit. She is hilarious, so we had a great time. We went to Brazenhead on Friday night for apple martinis, then to Axis where we did some booty droppin' and got our free CD. On Saturday we went to eat at BD's Mongolian BBQ and then to Spice Bar. Julie's brother came down from Cleveland to hang out with us too and kept buying me shots. On Sunday we went to an all-you-can-eat German buffet in German Village that was delicious. I had my fill of sausages, meat loaf, mashed potatoes and gravy and apple sauce. After dinner we went to have a few drinks at Zeno's. Kip came back from Pennsylvania on Sunday night so on Monday Kip, Julie, Sarah and I went to Union Station for lunch before Sarah left for the airport.

I love you, Sarah!

Brokeback Mountain

Others have already posted about the movie theater in Utah that decided against showing Brokeback Mountain but I wanted to add my two cents on the matter since I haven't blogged in a while. Thanks to Chris for emailing me some quotes about this issue.

So Larry H. Miller, a prominent Utah businessman decided to pull Brokeback Mountain from his movie theater that had been set to show the movie. The ensuing media attention caused the only theater(a small artsy theater) in Utah showing Brokeback to get a lot of business. The GLBT community in Utah called for a boycott of all of Miller's businesses(which includes the Delta Center where the Utah Jazz play). Heath Ledger even spoke out about this issue: "I heard a while ago that West Virginia was going to ban it. But that's a state that was lynching people only 25 years ago, so that's to be expected. Personally, I don't think the movie is (controversial) but I think maybe the Mormons in Utah do. I think it's hilarious and very immature of a society. If two people are loving . . . I think we should be more concerned if two people express anger in love, than love."

I of course think that it's awful that Miller decided to pull the movie from his theater just because the movie is about a gay love story. Mormons aren't allowed to watch rated R movies(although this rule is kind of like drinking Coke, it's followed by a lot of Mormons but won't keep you from getting into the temple if you don't follow it), so if Miller was being a good Mormon and not showing the movie because it was against his beliefs he shouldn't show any rated R movies at his theater. He was just being a bigot. Still I don't see why it was made out to be such a big deal(although it turned out to be good for that little theater that got all the resulting business) because think of all the theaters that decided not to show Brokeback in the first place. We aren't calling for a boycott of all those theaters. It comes down to what the theater owners thought would be good business and in Utah showing a gay movie probably was seen as not good business. But I'm happy to report that the Cinemark 16 at the Provo Towne Center Mall is now showing Brokeback Mountain, so all those repressed BYU gay boys can drive down the street and see the movie.

I saw the movie with Kip(yes, we're back together) and enjoyed it a lot. It was amazing(and hot) seeing these two famous actors portraying a gay love story. It wasn't my favorite movie though because somehow I wasn't impacted as much as I thought I'd be, I didn't cry, for example. Still, I thought the scenery and acting were amazing. I was a little weirded out by seeing The Princess Diaries' Anne Hathaway and Jen from Dawson's Creek show their breasts but oh well. I'm glad the movie was made and that this powerful gay love story was brought into the mainstream.

Trip to New York City

I got back last night from a fun trip to New York City for New Year's. I drove with Chris and Nate in my car on Thursday, arriving at about 8:30 PM to our hotel which was right off of Times Square. The drive was great until we had to wait in traffic at the Lincoln Tunnel. Thursday night we hung out in Chelsea after meeting our friend Will in the hotel. We ate at an Italian restaurant and then had dessert at another place called Rafaella's with two of Chris' friends. On the way we passed by Sarah Jessica Parker's brownstone apartment, so that was cool. We got to bed early at around 2:00 AM since we had had a long day of driving and knew that Friday would be a long day.

On Friday we ate lunch at a pizza place with some of Chris' blogging buddies. Then Chris, Will and I headed to the Metropolitan Museum of Art to see the Van Gogh drawings. It was fun to see all those works of Van Gogh. I wish we would have had more time to see the rest of the art in the Met, but we had to rush off to meet our other friends from Columbus(Rob, Aaron, Sanjida, Amy, Donny and Steve) for dinner. Dinner was at a delicious Cuban restaurant called Havana. No one wanted to split the paella with me but I had to get it even though it was really expensive. Chris and I shared a pitcher of delicious strawberry mojitos. The paella was amazing(as good as I've had in Spain) but I could only eat half of it, but I took the rest back to the hotel. After dinner most of use went to see Avenue Q. It turned out to be a really fun musical. There was especially one song that I really like called "There's a Fine, Fine Line." After the musical we went back to our hotel to get ready to go out. We got our drink on with rum and coke and then headed to Opaline on 39th. It was an awesome club with five floors and lots of people. We had a fun time dancing until we left at about 3:30 AM.

We woke up late on Saturday morning and Will and I rode the subway to meet everyone for lunch at a sushi place on 7th and Christopher St. We sang Sanjida happy birthday and the brought her a cake with a candle on it. The food was delicious. It was snowing/sleeting by the time we left. I stopped at Jamba Juice to get a Mango-a-Go-Go drink while everyone else went to Starbucks. Then Aaron, Chris, Will, Sanjida and I headed to Ground Zero. There's not much to see except for a big hole in the ground, but I'm glad I got to see it and reflect on what happened there on September 11th. We headed back to the hotel to relax and get warm before going out for New Year's Eve. We walked to the end of our street and listened to a band play and saw the crowd at Times Square so we could at least say that we had done that, although Aaron and I and apparently Sanjida wanted to come back to watch the ball drop. We headed out to dinner which ended up being at a tavern with Middle Eastern food. I enjoyed my chicken kebabs. We split from the other group after dinner and headed to a house party of one of Aaron's friends. The party was fine but I didn't know anyone but Aaron, Chris and Will and had no interest in the guys that kept talking to me about stuff I didn't care about. I also wasn't drinking because that morning I had decided to eat the rest of my paella from the night before after it had sat out all night and so my stomach was a little upset(but it was totally worth it because it was so good, even cold). I also knew I had a long drive ahead of me the next day and didn't want to have to do it hungover. One of my goals though was to drink a glass of champagne on New Year's and I did get to do that for the first time ever. I found out that Sanjida and everyone else had gone to Times Square and I regretted not going there to see the ball drop. It was a little ridiculous seeing the ball drop in New York City on a TV screen instead of in Times Square. I got back to the hotel room after an interesting cab ride at about 2:00 AM. I didn't sleep much though because everyone kept coming in and leaving the rest of the night as people arrived home, packed their bags and left for the airport.

I drove back with just Nate since Chris is going directly to Connecticutt for work. We got lost trying to get on I-76, but other than that we had a nice trip, arriving home at about 7:00 PM. I was glad I got to spend time with my friends in New York City for New Year's. I only wish Mathiew and Kip were there like they were supposed to be and that I had gone to Times Square for New Year's Eve. Time will tell if 2006 is better than Jan 1st was.

Dave's Birthday

On Wednesday night Dave and I drove up to Salt Lake to go to karaoke night at the Trap, one of the gay clubs in Salt Lake. I love going there on Sunday nights because they play Latin music, but tonight we were just going to sing songs and get drunk. And we did, thanks to drinks beforehand at CJ's and vodka Jello made by Dave's friend Saia. Dave and I sang "I'll Cover You" and "The Boy is Mine" and were backup singers for a lot of the other people doing karaoke. We had lots of fun and brought Dave's birthday in with a bash. We slept over at CJ's house, and when I got home I got lectured by my dad for not telling them that I was not coming home.

On Thursday night for Dave's birthday he wanted me to take him grocery shopping at Walmart since he doesn't have a car. Then we went to the gym for three hours, working out for two hours and sitting in the hot tub/pool for an hour.

We also went out Friday night to the Sound. It opened since I moved away, but I've been there once for New Year's Eve last year. It was a fun night. There was a drag show and the music is really fun there, a nice change from Axis' music. It was fun to dance and get crazy with Dave again. He smuggled in a bottle of Smirnoff in his sock and we bought some Sobe at the club so we could mix it in the bathroom. We are so cheap, I love it. I'm so glad Dave and I are still best friends even though I live so far away and that I got to be here for the start and end of his birthday.

Home for the Holidays

I arrived in Salt Lake at around 10:00 PM last Saturday. I could definitely tell I was flying to Salt Lake because half of the plane was filled with hot young guys. The disturbing part was that it seemed like they all had their Books of Mormon with them. The guy next to me read his the whole way from Phoenix to Salt Lake.

My sister picked me up from the airport. She brought her boyfriend with her so I got to meet him. They're planning on getting married next May. They just met last July. Mormons typically move really fast. He seems nice. She seems happy though so that's good. Pretty soon I'll be the only non-married one of all my siblings. Looks like I'll be taking another trip back here in May. I got home and said hi to my parents before going to bed.

My dad made waffles on Sunday morning and asked me to go to church with them. I told him I would go next week on Christmas, but I wasn't going today. While they were at church I went to the store and visited my best friend Dave. It was good to see him again. I was glad I didn't have to go to church when I didn't want to like I had done for so long.

Things are going well with my whole family. It seems pretty normal, like before I came out to them. I'm glad they've had time to get used to the idea. My nieces and nephews are totally cute. I went shopping with my sister-in-law which was a lot of fun. I got to talk about my life in Ohio, which my other family members don't really ask me about. I think they kind of block out the fact that I'm gay, which is how they deal. But Sage told me some family secrets that were pretty surprising. Just goes to show we're not the perfect Mormon family like everyone tries to portray. Although things seem back to normal with my family I don't really like hanging out with them for too long. I'll be excited to go back to Ohio. It makes me not very excited for Christmas this year.

Last night I went with my parents and my sister and her boyfriend to Salt Lake to eat at Crown Burger and see the Christmas lights at Temple Square. Dinner was fun but I didn't like walking around the temple because it reminded me of all the things I don't like about the church. For example, I won't get to see my sister get married because it will be in the temple, and only Mormons who follow all the rules of the church are allowed to go in. Everyone was coupled up and I couldn't help but think how I wouldn't be able to hold hands with a boy there. Utah can be fun but I haven't been able to go out yet. Hopefully tonight Dave and I will go out with some of his friends up in Salt Lake.

Update on the Provo High GSA

The Provo High School Gay-Straight Alliance that I talked about here
and here is in the newspaper again. This time a state senator wants to introduce a bill in the next Legislative session to ban the club. One of his arguments is this:

In my mind, if you are in the chess club, what do you talk about? Chess. If you are in the dance club, what do you talk about? Dance. If you are in a gay club, what do you talk about? I just don't believe members of sexual orientation clubs should be sanctioned by the public schools — what they are talking about even a part of the public schools. They should not be allowed to have that on school property at all. It's just wrong.

You can read the rest of the article for all the arguments for and against this proposed bill. I don't think it will stand up in court and that the club will still be able to meet. Just goes to show you how messed up some people's(i.e. Mormons) view of sexual orientation is.

On Saturday I'm heading home to Utah for Christmas. I'll be there for ten days. I hope I survive. And although I love my family, I can't wait until I'm back in Ohio.

[Update]
The governor of Utah gives his opinion on the proposed bill.

Survivor: Guatemala finale

Last night was the Survivor finale. The final three were Danni, Rafe and Stephenie. Rafe and Steph should have taken Lydia with them to the final three so that either of them would have won the last immunity challenge, then taken the other to the final two. Rafe went behind Steph's back and made a promise to Danni that he would take her to the final three, so Lydia was voted out. At the challenge Rafe was the first out and it came down to Steph and Danni and the way the challenge was set up Danni won because she was so tall, she had no problem leaning against the pole. It was heartbreaking to see Steph give it her all but finally fall down. Rafe was a good sport and told Danni she didn't have to take him to the final two even though she promised him she would. I was so close to having my dream finale of Rafe and Steph. Danni decided to take Steph with her to the final two because she thought she had a better chance of winning against Steph because Steph had backstabbed so many people. I had mixed feelings about Steph being in the final two over Rafe but I have loved Steph ever since Palau, so to see her make it to the final two was awesome. I just wish she could have gone with the gay Mormon that played an amazing game. But it is Rafe's fault that Danni won the last immunity challenge and he was the first one out of the challenge, so I think Steph deserved to be in the final two. Unfortunately, the jury voted Danni the winner. What a disappointing end to my favorite season of Survivor. Steph deserved to win. Maybe she'll be back for another season.

SSA should not mean Same-Sex Attraction

I take a pause from posting about my personal life to bring you this article from my home state's newspaper.

Gives you some insight into the way the Mormon church works. I'm so glad this didn't happen to me as much, but my heart goes out to others out there who are struggling as Matis did. I hate how the Mormon Church labels being gay as SSA to make it sound like a disease that can be cured. Also check out the part that says,

After a sacred experience Fred says he had in the temple in the hours following their conversation with Stuart, he and his wife prayed together there and "turned Stuart over to Heavenly Father." The details are too personal to recount, but a certain peace came to them, they said.

Basically this poor man's parents let him commit suicide after receiving inspiration in the temple that it was ok to let him go. How scary is that! I personally don't think God was behind that.

I bet I know what a favorite gift among my family will be this year for Christmas.

SSA really stands for sulfosalicylic acid and is used to test for protein in the urine. (I'm studying for my Renal exam.)

Outwit, Outplay, Outlast

Survivor fans will recognize the title of this post from that reality show. I am a huge Survivor fan. This season the players are in the Guatemalan jungle. There're two characters in particular that I like-Rafe, a gay Mormon and Steph, who I fell in love with when she was on Survivor:Palau(they brought her back this season). I will be happy if either wins. For those who don't remember the premise of Survivor, 16 people are put in a remote location, they learn how to cope with little food and water, going through a series of competitions and voting off one person each show until the last two people remain. At that point it's up to the jury composed of the last seven players voted off to choose the Survivor who is most deserving to win a million dollars. We are now down to five players, Judd being voted off at the last tribal council.

Lately I can't help but feel like I'm playing my own version of Survivor. The winner earns the chance to be with Kip, a prize I'd much rather have than a million dollars. There are only two players in this version of Survivor. We both have different factors working in our favor. I happen to live in the same state as Kip, for example. The other player got the advantage this week, but it's far from over.

It's getting down to the nitty gritty and I'm trying to keep myself from getting paranoid like so many Survivor players do. I have no idea how this will ultimately end and it's tearing me apart. I wish the other player would realize that he needs to step away from the game. Everyone has their first love that they feel like they want to be with forever, but he needs to move on and let Kip be happy. In the meantime I'm giving Kip the space he wants, hoping the time we shared was enough to help him see I'm the one he should choose.

Many of you probably think I shouldn't wait around for Kip while he decides who he wants to be with. But this week apart has shown me even more that I don't want to be without Kip, I like him too much. He makes me so happy when we're together. I know he's going through a rough time right now and I need to give him the time he needs to work through it all.

I prefer watching Survivor on TV where my own feelings aren't involved. The winner of Survivor:Guatemala will be decided mid-December. I think I'm gonna have to wait longer than that to see who wins Survivor:Ohio.